Having spent the last several hours working on this website, I'm in no mood to come up with something truly original and amusing. But since so much of amusement comes to me in the form of conversation, and since a conversation can reveal so much about a person, I give you this piece of true dialogue between a friend and me:
Not_Kai: once a chicken truck overturned in [home state] in the middle of the morning rush hour. it was the coolest thing ever!!
Kai: 'sides, it's not like those buffalo chickens are endangered.
Kai: No accident, I'm sure. An act of chicken liberation terrorism.
Not_Kai: i wish i had gotten involved sooner!
Kai: Have you long pined after the chickens who had no choice in the loss of their lives to feed the appetites of the greedy and the greasy?
Not_Kai: my mom refused to pull over and let me grab a few loose birds...i still feel a twinge of (hungry) regret when I think back on that morning...
Kai: It's like one of those movies where one simple decision could yield a completely different life.
Kai: You might be housewife to a Texas oil tycoon right now if not for your mom.
Kai: Who knows what could've happened had you had those live chickens? Having snapped their necks and plucked their feathers, you might've found a taste for death and become a hired killer.
Not_Kai: ooh! it's never too late for that!
Not_Kai: my mother is going nuts. we bought a 6-pack (of lint roller brushes) and she is using them on the carpet!!! HELP!!!
Kai: And upon her victims one could always find crumbs of pumpkin pie...
Not_Kai: ooh. pie!
Kai: Okay. That's just freakish.
Kai: Why doesn't she just have new carpet installed in your apartment on a monthly basis?
Not_Kai: she's getting closer...what if she misses the carpet and gets my head??? you might have to cozy up to Sam for a ride home...
Kai: Yes, because, as is common knowledge, your head is one big lint ball.
Oh yeah. Welcome to CXM. Come for the comics, stay for the sweet nothings we whisper in your ear.